John 12:1-8
As John tells this story, Jesus has traveled almost to Jerusalem. He’s staying in Bethany with some of his closest friends and supporters – Lazarus, Mary and Martha. The disciples who accompanied him had gathered in this home. It would have been crowded because homes were small and the group travelling with Jesus at that point was relatively large. They were all tired from long hours interacting with crowds and long days journeying across the countryside. They were stressed because Jesus was headed toward Jerusalem, the seat of power and the garrisons of Roman soldiers. Jesus had attracted the attention of both the Roman and religious leaders and none of them liked him. They thought he was a troublemaker. In those days in Jerusalem trouble makers were crucified.
That evening they had dinner together, like they often had. It must have been a weighty occasion. Like the last time you visit a dear relative who is terminally ill. The last time you gather before the oldest child moves across country. We can remember similar occasions in our lives and get a sense of how they felt. Glad to be together and worried about tomorrow. On edge. Exhausted.
To mark that occasion Mary, one of the hosts of this party, not only washes the feet of Jesus, the guest. She covers them with costly, sweet-smelling ointment and wipes them wither hair. There’s no way to see that act but as an incredibly intimate, personal moment. It was Mary showing Jesus how much he mattered to her; how he had changed her life. It could have been any one of them expressing their love, but it was Mary. Judas objected. It was an extravagant excess in a time when so many were near starvation. John explains it as a foreshadowing of Jesus’ death and of Judas’ betrayal. But I think it’s okay for us not to explain it at all. It was one friend showing another how much she cared. Jesus was willing to take it at that, and to be grateful.
This is the one message I want you to hear in this story: we all deserve care. We all deserve people in our lives who tell us how much we matter to them and who do extravagantly kind things for us just because. I want us to take a minute to remember what that feels like. To remember a time someone gave you the gift of comfort and connection because you matter. … Moments like that are a gift, and we all need them to carry us through the pivot points of our lives.
Many of us are feeling like we’re living in a moment that demands that we do something to fix things. We need to fix our country. We need to fix the world. We need to fix poverty and illness and division and you name it. It can be a heavy burden. We can be exhausted and discouraged. When live seems bigger than you can manage, remember even Jesus let Mary rub his feet just for a little while. Jesus and his friends stopped to have a dinner party just before his last big moment of ministry. You can’t work all the time.
It's common these days to analyze almost everything, so we talk about how we give and receive love. Gary Chapman wrote The Five Love Languages to help people communicate what makes them feel loved and to consider how they say, “I love you.” That’s a worthwhile endeavor. What makes you feel loved and cherished? Quality time? Acts of service? A gold watch?
It's also good for us to think about how we most like to show love. I want to cook dinner or sew a quilt. What do you want to do for people?
In a time when there’s lots of talk about what’s broken, it’s good for all of us to think about how we give and receive love. Jesus and his friends shared dinner and a pound of nard. What are we doing to care for each other in these days?
Please hear clearly:
You deserve love and compassion and comfort.
You can give love and compassion and comfort.
No matter how confusing or frustrating or even dangerous our times, acts of love and compassion and comfort matter. They are, I believe, holy moments. We are intended to share them because they will sustain us all.